It is finally over. The vet and her assistant visited our home a little while ago, and Kuña-i was allowed to slip away peacefully on the couch, among loved ones.
It seems that, sensing something, she has been even more fargone the last couple of days since we made the decision-exhibiting a few behaviors that have been uncharacteristic for the dog that we've known all these years. We've spent the last couple of days giving her all the affection we could, and trying prepare Lucy as much as possible for the fact that there will no longer be a gentle, furry friend to receive her hugs and attention.
Today, we were crying throughout the procedure but it was an amazingly comforting feeling, at the end, to realize I wasn't feeling guilty at all about the decision; just sad. Unbelievably sad, but quite secure, finally, that we've absolutely made the right call. We had the opportunity to kiss and touch all our favorite warm and fuzzy places, assure her that she is and will always be loved, and send her gently into the soft and fading light.
Below is a slideshow we put together this last summer, when we originally thought she would not survive the week. Last night, I took and added a single photo at the end that may or may not give much indication of the extent of her physical decline over the last number of months.
Please take a moment to look through the years of joy with our amazing companion. Remembering my girl
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6 comments:
I have been thinking of your dog all day. Interesting to see a picture of me and your dog. I do have a lot of memories of her. Am I the only friend in the group that is in a picture with her?
Ironically, yes; ironic in the sense that Pat & Pat definitely would consider themselves "dog lovers." I think those two definitely consider their lives touched in some measure from time spent with our fine & friendly beast, but I don't think anything was ever captured on film.
Aaron & Krista had a few occasions to be around Kuna-i, but it seemed like, more than anyone else, they really seemed to bring out the farts in her.
Lovely.
Very sad as well, brought more than a few tears to my eyes as I thought of her passing.
She and I spent a couple of sultry (weather-wise) nights together this last summer, passed out on the couch, or her next to the couch.
She was and always will be my friend.
Thanks for the kind words. Funny, the Star Trek quote you have there-I was thinking of another one on my drive into work this morning:
T'Pau: Live long and and prosper, Spock.
Spock: I shall do neither, for I have killed my captain.
Sort of the whole idea of me feeling like an executioner; Kuna-i trusted me with her life and I made the decision to end it. Of course, I have resolved this issue psychologically, but the exchange still came into my mind this morning...
No amount of pyschological preparation can totally eliminate the sense of guilt?/dread?/awe? inherent in the decision. She trusted you to make the right decision for her in all things, and ultimately, you did.
Actually, I really am quite comfortable with that. I just can't pass up a change for a good ol' TOG reference.
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